Attack of the Blob

Hand Sanitizer in BULK
Hand Sanitizer in BULK

There’s been a lot of talk in the news recently about this Swine Flu, or H1N1 virus. They say they’re expecting it to get worse this Winter and we should all be taking precautions. I was reminded of this earlier when I was in the store and saw this big jug of hand sanitizer. You’ve probably seen it; it looks like clear runny Jell-O. I figured it couldn’t hurt to be prepared so I asked the guy to bring a forklift and load me up a jug.

I went on about my shopping but every time I reached for something I couldn’t help but wonder how many other hands had already touched that can or that box or that banana. By the time I was done I was more than a little obsessed with thoughts of having touched things that were touched by other hands that had touched other things that had been touched by yet other hands.

When I got out to the truck with my load of goods and groceries the first thing I did was break open my new jug of hand sanitizer. I slathered it all over my hands and then leaned back in the seat to take a deep breath. After a bit I was ready to go, but as my hand touched the ignition key I realized I had touched that key before sanitizing my hands. So, I went back to the jug and this time I sanitized the key as well as my hands.

But then, I looked around. I had also touched the steering wheel, and the door handle, and the center console, and the climate controls, and who knows what was on my hands in the past when I didn’t have hand sanitizer? I’m a little fuzzy on the details but the next thing I knew, I and the inside of my truck looked like we’d been attacked by the Blob. There was clear runny Jell-O everywhere, but I was pretty sure it was safe.

Unfortunately, I had used up nearly all of my jug of hand sanitizer; which meant I was going to have to go back into the store for more; which meant I was going to have to…….touch stuff……..ohhh no.

Hope your day goes well. Cordially yours,

Tim Couch